RIP Larry the Lobster, 1936(?)-2016


My favorite photo of Larry. I wanted you all to see it.

ABC NEWS – Larry the lobster, a giant 15-pound crustacean who rose to fame last week after being rescued from the dinner table at a Florida restaurant, has died.

The lobster, originally believed to be 110 years old, had been shipped to the Maine State Aquarium last Wednesday by animal activists who thought he deserved to continue living, according to Brooke Estren, an attorney based in Boca Raton who helped rescue and package Larry.

Estren told ABC News last week that Larry was supposed to arrive at the aquarium the following day. But Jeff Nichols, communications director for the Maine Department of Marine Resources, which operates the aquarium, said he didn’t arrive until nearly a week later — this past Wednesday.

Larry the Lobster is DEAD!* You’re damn right I had to whip out the ole phone to do the math on when Larry the Lobster was born. That’s beside the point. Larry the Lobster is dead after 80 some years. Animal activists for animals that literally have a brain the size of an insect, are probably the worst people on earth. And this is coming from someone who wrote about vegans earlier this week.
Listen, I understand that we treat a lot of animals like shit before we eat them. Pigs and cows and chickens usually don’t deserve to be treated the way they are. But we’re talking about a lobster here. An animal that is more closely related to a giant bug than it is to a pig or a sheep. I can guarantee you that Larry had no clue where we was. He could have been staying in the Taj Mahal and it wouldn’t have made a difference to Larry. Larry would have lived another happy 100 years in his lobster tank in Florida. Larry is dead now, though. And his dead lobster blood is all over the hands of animal rights activists. They packed him up like a pint of ice cream and dropped his lobster ass in the mail.

“We’re not doing an autopsy, but it appears the way the lobster was extensively handled and the way it was packaged appears to have contributed to his death”

You animal rights people don’t know when to leave well enough alone. Go find a hobby. Collect stamps or start urban farming or something stupid and hipster like that. Whatever you do, leave the lobsters out of it. We lost a beautiful, butter poached soul today, and it all could have been avoided. #RIPLarry

*Not this Larry the Lobster That's_No_Lady_34

Larry Photo courtesy of Joe Melluso/Tin Fish


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